Not all relationships will have the right tools or ingredients to last and this goes for long distance relationships as well. It’s important to remember that so-called “failed relationships” can be just as important or beneficial to your life as successful ones. With each failed relationship you have, you learn more about yourself and get a better picture of what kind of person you are truly looking for.
Here are some of the ways you may be able to tell if your long distance relationship is headed towards a break-up and ways you can try to save it or simply realize that ending the relationship may be the better option.
Signs Your Long Distance Relationship May be Ending or Breaking Down
You would think it would be easy to identify all the signs that a relationship may not be going smoothly, but we can sometimes be blinded from the truth. This may be caused by wanting to be in a relationship so badly or our partners not wanting to hurt our feelings. This is why it is so important to get the input of close friends and family that can give us an outsider’s glimpse on our relationship.
With traditional relationships where distance is not an issue, it may be easier to see that your partner may be detaching from the relationship since you can pick up on visual cues. You may notice they stop holding your hand or become less affectionate. They may begin to lose eye contact or their body language may take on a standoffish look. They may stop planning dates or might not accept your invitations to do things.
With long distance relationship you can only pick up on these visuals when you are together which may not occur very frequently. You therefore must resort to relying on the conversations you share with your partner to pick up on signs your relationship may be headed south. You may notice your partner closing down in terms of expressing themself or avoiding conversations concerning the future. Phone calls, texts, or emails may become less frequent. Where once they may have been sending gifts or hand written letters, they may now not be making as much of an effort.
That being said, it is important to note that as a relationship grows, it can be difficult to keep up the same level of enthusiasm you once had for the relationship or your partner. This original period of enthusiasm is known as the honeymoon period; the period where you get butterflies every time you see or talk to your new partner. You both tend to go out of your way to showering each other with love. As the relationship moves past this phase and the butterflies migrate, you may get the impression that you or your partner is losing interest. This may not be the case at all, rather your relationship is simply evolving into something new. This is when communication is important to find out what the truth may be.
Arguing or fighting may not signal that your relationship is faltering, rather it may show that you simply need to work on your communication. By working through arguments, you can get to the root of the problem to see if it was simply a misunderstanding or something which can easily be fixed. All relationships are guaranteed to have arguments but it is how you both deal with them which will dictate whether your relationship can last.
Along with looking for signs that your partner may be looking for an out from the relationship, you have to notice if you yourself are having any doubts. If you find that the relationship is causing you too much stress or is having a negative impact on your daily life, it is a good time to discuss this with your partner to decide if it something that can be fixed or if it may be better to end the relationship.
If you find yourself showing interest in other potential partners or have the urge to date other people, then it probably means you are not ready for a serious relationship. There is nothing wrong with wanting to date or not wanting to be in a relationship, but it is your responsibility to be honest with your partner if that is the case.
Tips for Improving Communication and Trust with Your Long Distance Relationship Partner
- Hold eye contact while speaking to each other on video chat or when together in-person.
- Always be open to answering your partner’s questions.
- Stay focused on the present and going forwards while refraining from bringing up past events you have already dealt with.
- Avoid telling white lies as they often progress into more serious ones.
- Be upfront and honest with your partner as much as possible. Don’t hold onto secrets that may involve or affect your partner.
- Avoid raising your voice or expressing anger in unhealthy ways.
- Keep in mind that your partner cannot read your mind.
- Avoid distractions such as TV or staring at your phone while talking with your partner.
- Pay attention to your partner’s non-verbal cues to learn how they are truly feeling.
- Make use of “I” and “we” statements, while avoiding “you” statements which can come of sounding like an attack and force your partner to be defensive.
- Remember that actions speak louder than words when trying to gain trust.
- If trust is broken, discuss ways it can be restored with your partner.
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