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So how can you tell if your long distance partner is straying from your relationship and cheating on you? When it comes to long distance relationships, you can’t exactly snoop through your partner’s computer or phone to find evidence of disloyalty, not that I would advise that anyway. Being in a long distance relationship isn’t necessarily a drawback when it comes to worrying about your partner cheating and an honest partner should be able to be trusted regardless of your relationship situation.

If you find yourself not being able to trust your partner, it may be a sign that your relationship isn’t exactly healthy to begin with. When your relationship evolves to the point where you have decided to make your bond official or monogamous, you should have already developed a high degree of trust with your partner. If you are having trust issues, it may mean you may have rushed into things too quickly. It could also mean you may need to have a deep discussion with your partner to find out why you are having trust issues and whether they are warranted or if it may be a personal issue you need to explore.

Signs Your Long Distance Girlfriend or Boyfriend May be Cheating on You

Though there are cases where long distance relationship couples will experience infidelity, the truth is these types of relationships are not more prone to cheating than traditional relationships. However, it is good to know what to look for.

The first step is for you and your partner to decide and agree on what constitutes as cheating and what will and will not be tolerated in your relationship. Will your relationship define cheating as kissing or sleeping with another person or will it include a larger list of actions and behaviors you deem inappropriate?

People have different opinions on what constitutes cheating and it can include both physical and emotional actions. You and your partner need to be on the same page when it comes to what is allowed in the relationship when it comes to interaction with others. If you can’t come to agreement on the terms of your relationship, then you might want to take a step back until you are both willing to agree to the same level of commitment. Alternatively, you may wish to look for a different partner who will be more in line with your level of thinking.

As for the classic forms of cheating where your partner is exploring a deep emotional or physical relationship with someone other than yourself, you may come across concrete evidence yourself or may be tipped off by someone else. Having someone inform you of your partner’s infidelity may be rarer in a long distance relationship unless you happened to have met or made close friendships with the friends or family of your long distance partner. If they don’t really know you or have no way of contacting you, they won’t be able to share any information about your partner should they discover anything you should know.

If your partner always insists that they be the one to visit you, it could mean they are simply embarrassed of where they live or it may mean that they are hiding something. Having you visit may make it more difficult for them to juggle multiple relationships or they may even have someone living with them.

How to survive and make a long distance relationship last successful

It doesn’t necessarily mean your partner is cheating if they always seem busy, isn’t able to take your calls, or doesn’t respond to texts and emails. Some people are workaholics and may genuinely have a lot on their plate. The key is to look for sudden or drastic changes to your partner’s behavior. If you both used to talk on a nightly basis or your partner normally showers you with tokens of their admiration and those things suddenly become infrequent or stop altogether, you may need to have a discussion with them to find out the reason for the change.

If you notice your partner posting pictures of themself spending time with other people, don’t immediately assume that they may be exploring other options. The explanation could be as simple as the other person being a family member you are unaware of or an old school/work friend. You must be really careful to not jump to conclusions and be very practical when you approach them about it.

However, if your LDR partner is posting pictures where it clearly shows there may be something more or if there seems to be continual engagement or risqué comments shared between your partner and another person, then it may be time to rethink the status of your relationship. You would hope your partner would not be so blatant about their disregard for the relationship you share together.

Another sign your partner may be hiding something is catching them telling small lies. If they cannot talk because they say they are tired and heading to bed but you see evidence they instead attended an event or had a night on the town, it could mean something isn’t quite right. Lies don’t necessarily equate to cheating but they may signal there are other problems with the relationship. As we have discussed, communication and trust are vital to a long distance relationship. If either begins to break down, you then have some serious repair work to do if you want your relationship to last.

Just as some people are not comfortable with public displays of affection such as kissing or holding hands, so too is the case with people’s online life. Don’t feel hurt if your partner isn’t comfortable posting pictures publicly on their social media accounts of the two of you together or doesn’t comment with love hearts and “I love you” on your posts.

Some people really like to keep their private life exactly that, private. If they have trouble expressing their love for you privately or if their eagerness to share their love for you changes suddenly, then it may be a signal that your relationship has hit a snag or they may have another love interest.

The biggest red flag of all that your partner may be cheating is if they are unwilling or refuse to talk about the issue when you bring it up to them. If your partner is truly committed to your relationship and cares about you, they will take the time to try and ease your worries by being open to any questions or concerns you have. Redirecting or refusing to answer questions is the most common way to avoid facing an issue. If your partner wishes to avoid an issue, that most likely means they are hiding something.

People need to realize that it is alright to feel that their relationship may not be what they were looking for. People and circumstances change and if you are certain you don’t want to continue the relationship or don’t wish to make an effort to solve any issues, it’s important to be honest with yourself and your partner.

The solution to ending a relationship you don’t want to be in isn’t to go and begin a new relationship behind your partner’s back. It is your responsibility to have a discussion with your partner that expresses your decision to end the relationship. Whatever your reasons may be, make sure you give your partner the respect they deserve by giving them the honest reason you are choosing to break up.

Ending a relationship is never easy, but you may be able to avoid a massive fight with your partner and may even be able to salvage a long lasting friendship out of the deal by coming to them before you decide to look elsewhere. Only after you end a relationship should you explore other more suitable partners. This allows you to come away from the relationship without being labelled a cheater and will give your next relationship a much better chance of success since you’ll be starting off on the right foot.

By ending a relationship respectfully, your partner will hopefully respect your decision and may even be happy for you when you find someone that is a better fit for you. They may of course be hurt and could easily take it personally, but you have to be honest to yourself and your partner or it will only prolong the inevitable and make ending the relationship exponentially harder down the road. If your partner responds to your decision harshly, then that’s on them, but at least you can walk away knowing you did the right thing. More often than not, they will eventually realize they were in the wrong.

It’s very important to realize when your relationship needs to end and accept when it’s time to move on. There is nothing wrong with trying to make relationship work, but sometimes there comes a point where it has simply run its natural course. Please don’t fall into silly traps like hiring “spell casters” who promise to cast spells to get the love of your life back. This con, along with many others, are designed to take money from desperate people and they have been making their rounds on the internet lately.

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Meg and Mike Jerrard are the Long Distance Relationship experts, and authors of best selling book ‘The Ultimate How To Guide on Surviving Long Distance Love‘. An American and an Australian who met in Tanzania, Africa, they have since closed the distance and now help others on their LDR journey too.

Join over 9,300 other couples in our Facebook Group specifically for support and advice: “Long Distance Relationships: Advice & Support Group”.

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The Ultimate How To Guide on Surviving Long Distance Love”

 

 

 

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